I come not to bury Bill Self...

So it's 15 degrees outside, it's finals time, and the Jayhawks stink. I'm not gonna be that guy that gets all emotional about a bunch of 19 and 20-year-olds, but ok, I guess I actually am.

First, however, I wanted to talk about the Bowl season (shocking, I know). It is, of course, the best time of the year. So here's the lineup, take a look and get familiar with it, make your plans accordingly. We'll be talking much more about it soon. Also, I found this piece in the NY Times on Texas Tech head coach Mike Leach quite interesting (free registration required).

I don't think I need to go into many details about the basketball KU has played this year. It's really a quite simple formula, just dust it off after the game and spare yourself the trouble of reading about the game elsewhere:

"So and so looked really good in spurts, but in the end the Jayhawks didn't have enough. Turnovers from Jeff Hawkins hurt, and the freshmen were inconsistent. Somebody on the KU staff wore a terrible suit, and someone else told the opponents to fuck off."

That last part really only happened in the Nevada game. I have it on good authority (someone on Tigerboard) that Nick Fazekas said "Kansas ain't shit", to which assistant coach Joe Dooley said "Fuck you". The latter was clearly seen on ESPN after the game, the former was not. Not that it matters, even if Fazekas said it I don't see how Dooley was upset as it's almost certainly true right now.

Then there's the shadiness in shady Larrytown. We pulled the Larry Brown with Mario Chalmers and hired his father Ronnie (it's not shady - he was moving to Lawrence anyway and has a great basketball mind - right). But the best is Darnell Jackson. Darnell who you say? Well he's not playing right because he was given benefits (including a "loan") by a KU supporter in Oklahoma. Let's not be surprised, he was a high school pal of JR Giddens. The alum (well known and mocked for his poetry about KU basketball) apparently didn't realize he wasn't allowed to pay college players. I make that mistake all the time.

The NCAA handed down a nine-game suspension to Jackson, which came from the eligibility committee (or "cabinet" as it's called on the NCAA website). The infractions committee is still looking at self-reported violations from last year, and it's not clear to me if this would be something they would also consider as they decide penalties. If only I knew someone who had experience dealing with these things, someone who worked for the NCAA enforcing these rules for years, like maybe an uncle..., but alas, I do not...

And now there's this: KU: NCAA probe of Rush "no issue".

All together, it's crappy time for KU basketball right now. Honestly though, I remember the days of Kirk "Captain Insano" Hinrich and Drew "Puddin' Head" Gooden trying to play their first year, and it was ugly. I don't think anyone thinks that Brandon Rush and the rest won't get their games together, likely sooner than later. The kids who won the title last year also went to the NIT their freshmen years. The tide will turn, or I'll just start watching the NBA sooner than April.

Seeing the guys go down in flames in Maui did remind me of some good times. Those early season games when you'd say, we're playing who?, and then promptly KU would go out and lose to them. Here's my favorite early season kicks in the dick:

Temple 73, KU 59 - December 1, 1993. Oh yeah, in the Fieldhouse. KU was ranked number 2 going into this game, and got hammered. I remember thinking oh man, we lost to Temple. But apparently they were ranked number 7 going into this game, and Aaron McKie scored 24. I don't think that was a bad team.

Ball State 93, KU 91 - November 19, 2001. This was on my birthday, I hadn't remembered that. I do remember watching this game in Lawrence in the afternoon excited for the first real game of the year. KU had struggled through the previous couple of years, but after a good run to the Sweet Sixteen the year before, we thought we were loaded. Which of course we were, as we ended up in the Final Four. But everyone cramped this whole game, and Aaron Miles fell over and his man strolled to the goal for the winning score. I threw a box really hard and then was ok.

Iowa 85, KU 81 - December 8, 1998. I was a freshman. It was the first real game of the year in the Fieldhouse. So where was I? Sticking 3 tons of greenery into wire frames and guarding a turkey from Thetas. Ahh, the pledge days were great. But there was free booze, and, Thetas. Regardless, this is the game that killed the home winning streak, and let everyone know that Paul Pierce was not on the team anymore.

Long Beach State a bunch, KU less - date unknown. Did I dream this game? I can't find a box score anywhere. But I know LB State came into the Fieldhouse and handed us our rears. Anyone else remember this? I hate to think I still get upset about a game that never happened.

There have been, I suppose, a couple of good early season wins as well. Would you like to hear about them? Yeah!

LSU/UNLV/St John's, preseason NIT 1989 - in Roy Williams' second year we suddenly all realized that he might be able to coach a little. The year after the title I think Roy got a free pass - I was too young to read the message boards then, so maybe I just missed the criticisms, but I think with the title hangover, Manning and Brown leaving, and the probation few expected Roy to win right away. So, KU just went out and beat Shaq and Chris Jackson's (later know as Ayman al-Zawahri) #2 LSU team, and then #1 and eventual champ UNLV. In the final KU knocked off the Redmen (oh wait, the Red Storm, bleh) in Madison Square Garden for the preseason NIT title (and what a meaningful title it is).

KU 73, Cal 56 - November 19, 1993. Now this was a birthday. The same weekend KU beat Mizzou in football in Lawrence as well. I attended both game - thanks Lee and Susan. This was the first time I saw Jacque Vaughn in person. I remember him "out dueling" Jason Kidd, but the box score says Vaughn had 4 points, 2 assists in 18 minutes while Kidd had 22 and 6 in 39 minutes. I guess my memory was a little off. I do remember Jason Kidd being the best player I've ever seen in the Fieldhouse, and I don't think that memory is off. The full length bounce pass assist? Oh yeah, you remember that...

KU 81, UMass 75 - December 3, 1994. The inaugural Wooden Classic! At the Anaheim Pond! Did you know that John Wooden stopped in Lawrence and worked odd jobs on his way west? He helped build giant soul catchers in the sky as well, and built quite a theocracy in modern-day Utah (I think I got some cult stories mixed in there). UMass was #1, with Lou Roe (whatever happened to him?) and Marcus Camby. Camby scored 2 points, while Raef had 18, and KU won. It's always great to beat #1, but why does KU ALWAYS lose the first game they play after being ranked #1? And it would usually be the Big Monday game the same day the polls came out, so you couldn't enjoy it even a day...

KU 90, Arizona 87 - December 2, 1997. I have somewhat mixed feelings about this game. Zona won the important game the year before, and then KU comes back the next year and beats them in a fairly meaningless game in December. March! That's when you need to win, but since this is about early season wins - What a win! Raef brought us back from a weak first half and crushed in the second, ending with 32. It was part of the Great 8 (what marketing wizard came up with that one?) in Chicago.

Paul Pierce's team 20, opponents 18 - sometime in the September, 2000. Early in the school year, my friend Steven Wayne came into his house where I was hanging out with the news that KU was scrimmaging in the Fieldhouse. So of course we went down, as KU's football team that year (hold your breathe) was not very good.
We went upstairs and sat in the chairbacks where we never get to sit and watched the guys run the court. Roy was there, but couldn't instruct as practices hadn't started yet. Cheno was there with Kenny Gregory and Luke Axtell. Roy's favorites were there playing as well: Drew Gooden, Nick Collison, and Kirk Hinrich. After a couple of games, there was some commotion as someone as came strolling in with his luggage in tow: Paul Pierce. I was slightly excited. Here's how Steve describes it:

"The trinity were in attendance. I remember Coach Williams calling Nick, Drew and Kirk over individually to meet Paul. It seemed as though he wanted them to see where Kansas basketball could take them. In a sense, it was a passing of the torch moment. Little did I know that both Nick and Kirk would be good players in the league. Drew (ed's note: Drew Gooden, not me) is still stupid sometimes, but he's playing a lot so I guess he's alright. Billy Thomas was there and very out of shape, but played well. I remember being very excited about some floppy-haired kid from Texas whose name I have since forced myself to forget. It's just too painful to think how good that team could have been if that fucker could hit a shot. Kenny has some show-time breakaways and, as always, Frankenstein - errr - Chenowith sucked ass. I can't remember who Paul hit the shot in before the classic line, but for some reason, I think it was Kirk. I know it was fade-away three from about 26 ft. on the north end."

The classic line and the shot he's talking about? Well, the first game Paul ran in was close down to the end. Paul of course drilled the winning shot. Afterwards, Paul walked back towards midcourt with his hands in air and shouted "Still never lost a game in this place!"

It was awesome and hilarious. And that's the best early season game I ever saw, with about 4 people watching.

Are you going bowling? WE’RE going bowling.

brian luke, I never doubted you.

Friday night before the KU-ISU game I frantically searched my digital cable guide for a way to see the game. I got the feeling I had to see this game – both for my enjoyment and for yours, the faithful reader. The pay-per-view channels were of no help, however, as they didn’t list which games they would have the next day. After a half-hour, I was ready to give up. Then I realized the game was on Fox Sports. This should have been obvious: the only Big 12 game on and Fox always carries a game. Except in DC, where there is usually a thrilling match-up between Hofstra and Delaware, or Howard and James Madison (I’m not kidding - these are the games we get, unless we’re unlucky and have to watch Maryland) that preempts the early Big 12 game. The point is that this time I got to watch the game. From start to finish. On TV. And KU won. This was the first time this had happened since…maybe the Aloha Bowl in ’95?

Going into the game we knew that Nebraska had drilled Colorado, which was exactly what I didn’t want to have happen. Iowa State thus knew they could clinch the Big 12 North division title. Obviously that was before I realized the Cyclones were SCARED. With a title on the line last season they choked one away to MIZZOU at HOME, so it should have been clear KU had a great shot at home (I think I’m done with the all-caps now).

Suffering through the various ESPN shows at 11 am EST I said a word of thanks that I never bothered waking up at 10 am central to watch this crap. I won’t spend too much time on this, but I just want to make clear that ESPN sucks at a lot of things (Baseball Tonight is obviously always exempted when we’re discussing the suckiness of ESPN), and Gameday is now one of them. I’ll make an exception for Chris Ford, who is OK. Lou Holtz is a train wreck. Desmond Howard? If Desmond is going to be on, then clearly Rocket Ismail has to be on. I’m not sure why, he just does.

And Trev Alberts. Oh boy. We’ve been spared this guy this year because he quit. He got pissed and didn’t show up early in the year, as he didn’t feel he was featured enough on the show. Hahahahahahahahahahahahahha. Ha. How do you think the producers reacted when they heard that. I bet they laughed.

But this morning I’m feeling mad love for Herbstreit, as he picks the Jayhawks. Fuck yeah, fuck you Corso. I don’t think Herbstreit had any idea why he picked KU, but whatever. After the UT fiasco I’ll take any respect KU can get.

So we finally get to noon and Fox comes on with a shot of Memorial Stadium, and announce that its in the 60s and the sun is shining. I know you bastards in Lawrence were happy; I think most of us have sat through rain and 30s in late November for games.

I don’t remember the names of the announcers – I didn’t take notes. Forgive me. They’re not bad. That’s my overall impression. They certainly weren’t good, but they weren’t bad. They know both teams. They seem to know what KU has done this year and what they need to do on offense and defense. I haven’t seen Iowa State this year so I wouldn’t have noticed either way, but they knew about Iowa State’s giant Ed McCaffrey (white WR) player - Todd Blythe, and they know that the young QB will run a little, and doesn’t turn the ball over. Which he doesn’t, until the second half…

So the game starts like all games this year. Interceptions and solid defense. Throughout the first half the announcers discuss the wind almost non-stop. Talking to Chris, our on-the-site reporter: “What? The wind? UMmm, it’s fine.” So I’m guessing it wasn’t that much of an issue, and the color guy was a fool, especially since most of the big throws in the second half were “against” the wind.

Clark Green ran the ball a lot in the first half. Without success. The defense is looking fabulous. And then our defense forgets that you’re allowed a safety in the football game. I don’t have tape so I don’t know what defense we were in on ISU’s long td passes, but it sure had our corners in tight man-to-man. I think this is something KU must do, relying on Charles Gordon (junior from California, all Big 12 kick returner - first team, defensive back - second team, and wide recevier - honorable mention) andAqib Talib (redshirt freshman from Texas, honorable mention defensive back) to shut down the WRs, allowing the linebacks and safeties to play aggressive and close to the line of scrimmage. But it does not work against Ed McCaffrey. Once, I understand, he's tall, but the second time that kid just kinda shrugged Gordon off and scored, I thought maybe a double team might help (where the hell is the safety?). So we’re down 14-6 and it’s not looking great, but obviously when you’re only down eight…

We’ve got to have a score. I’m in a total negative mood, as the color man has convinced me that the players can hardly stand up against the wind, let alone score. Then Swanson completes a fantastic pass to the tight end for a big gain. Derek Fine is a good player. But Swanson is injured! Oh Christ, Brian Luke’s coming in. The horror! The horror!

I swear that I’ve always said that Brian Luke is a fabulous player, and I’m sure no one can say differently, except for the 1,000 people in section 105 at the OU game in Arrowhead.

But Brian Luke on the first play gets 8 yards on a scramble, down to the goal-line. And he, after much discussion, scores the touchdown on 4^th down. I see Brian Luke laying in the endzone with the ball and, I think, most of his torso is across the goal-line, but the refs call it down and give the ball to ISU on downs, FOX goes to commercial with the change of possession, and I’m swearing up and down in my empty apartment. Chris calls with a game report: the call is under review! I tell him Luke is easily in. That’s when you realize the greatness of the remote reporter. The call is reversed, Bob Davis convinces Max (congrats Max for retiring, best idea you’ve had in awhile) that it probably is an easy call to go for the 2, and the game is tied. “Well Bob, that sure was a good play by that young man. Now the Jayhawks will be on defense…”

And ISU scores in 2 plays (not really 2, but not very many) and we’re dead. But Brian Luke does it again!, throwing 2 touchdown passes down the stretch (the first one is dropped, defense gets the ball back, we score). OT looks good for us: our kicker (sophomore Scot Webb from Tulsa [go Union High, beat Jenks]) nailed a 48-yarder in the first half and Luke is playing well (I have to admit, I had written “and Luke is hot” there but then I changed it).

Regardless, the kick is good. Kansas wins in overtime. I’m excited. The fans tear down the posts again. I hate to be pithy, but I think you should not tear goalposts down after 3 of your 6 wins. Especially not Iowa State – why? Makes no sense. Unless we’re starting a tradition of tearing down goalposts after every victory: that I could support.

Now it’s time for the Bowl! We get to talk about what bowl we might go to, who we might play…this is fun, this is what fans of real football schools get to do this time of the year, rather than starting to pine for March in November and discussing which freshmen should be getting more minutes (Chalmers). By the way, does anyone know when KU’s basketball season starts?

SportsIllustrated.com predicts KU playing in the Independence Bowl against Florida. I doubt this will happen, but I have to chastise AD Lew Perkins, Rick Plumlee of the Wichita Eagle and Jason King of the KC Star for saying that it would be a terrible idea for KU to be in that game, and that the Fort Worth Bowl is better for us. Come on! I mean, ok, I understand the logic. Let’s win a bowl, we can drive to Dallas, whatever. I’m fine with the Fort Worthless Bowl. But to say it’s a better deal than playing Florida in the Independence is insane. People watch the Independence Bowl. People watch Florida. I would actually want to see that game. It’s like seeing Oklahoma play South Carolina – traditional power against an up-and-comer. I would think Florida would kill KU, but I think I’d like to see what happens, and I bet so does the team.

But I’m going to Dallas (Fort Worth?) to see the Bowl game. And that will be fun.

And Brian Luke, never listen to the critics, I had your back the whole time.